Many people are looking for a cure for their busy mind, for their Overthinking! What they are not realising is that they already have one!
The feelings we get when we have a busy mind are here FOR us and are not working against us. The feelings we get when we are Overthinking are a reminder, a nudge from mind that we are Overthinking. Feelings like tiredness, heaviness, anxiety, stress, anger, frustration and so on. But often it is the feelings that people are looking to cure, to release, to rid themselves of and not the busy mind itself.
What happens is one of two things:
People try to organise all of their ‘thoughts’ into categories of priority or importance in a bid to focus, or, they try to rid themselves of the negative thoughts.
These would be perfectly logical steps if controlling our thoughts was possible. Unfortunately, contrary to most psychological theories, it is in fact impossible. However, how unfortunate is that in reality? Lets look a little closer.
If in fact it were possible to control our thoughts, possibility would shrink. You just would not be able to think what you don’t already know. It just wouldn’t occur to you to have a thought that you did not know about. You would stick to the same old thoughts, day in, day out, believing that those are the thoughts available to you, or that those are the thoughts that serve you best and even those are the thoughts you are stuck with. Can you relate?
In fact, this is more common than we realise. It’s called ‘habitual thinking’. It’s thinking that sticks, forms neuro-pathways in our brain and these thoughts often become our default. It is the very fact that we believe we are in control that prevents us from noticing new fresh thinking, new ideas, new perspectives. If control of our thoughts was truly possible, Einstein would not have realised his theories, no new inventions would have been thought up and personal growth would not be a thing.
Furthermore, our mistaken belief that we get to control our thinking causes friction. Yes, we are actually trying to work against our own mind, our own universal mind. I did this for years. In my quest to feel better, to rid myself of depression and anxiety, I tried to have better thoughts, more positive thoughts. In essence, I simply took a shitty spoon to my mind and stirred it up, creating resistance. Resistance to mind energy feels unpleasant, feels difficult, stiff somehow, scary even. I really wanted to get rid of that feeling and so I stirred some more. I failed to understand that the feelings were trying to tell me something. There is wisdom in the feeling!
Whilst all of the thought was being stirred by me, I had very little chance to look into mind and catch a fresh new thought.
Fresh new thinking started to appear though, when I saw insightfully that I couldn’t change anything, that I aren’t that powerful. I gradually put down the shitty spoon and stopped stirring more often and I noticed other options, other thoughts that hadn’t occurred to me before. New fresh thinking emerges naturally, floats to the surface more readily when we allow mind to settle. In essence, what happened was this: I surrendered!
I surrendered to not having control. I surrendered to not being able to change how I feel. I realised that although I felt bad, I couldn’t die from a feeling, but, perhaps I could die from trying to do something about a feeling – think drugs, food, suicide. Yes, suicide was a constant thought for me and I even surrendered to the okayness of that. I accepted that I felt suicidal because I realised that if I was capable of changing that thought and feeling, after 8 years, I would surely have done so.
Like magic, I began to feel lighter, relieved of a burden that I had been carrying around for most of my life. I began to slip out of the habitual thinking that I had had to rely on previously because my mind had been too busy and messy form me to notice anything other. Thoughts such as ‘I have to feel better’, ‘I have to try harder’, ‘I am not enough’ suddenly started to look less solid and real. New thoughts like ‘it isn’t true that you’re not good enough’ accompanied with a lightness and deep knowing arose and I started to see that my innate state is peace and calm. Furthermore, I saw that my innate state is more readily available when I am not trying to achieve it. It was the ‘trying to achieve it’ that was causing the ‘felt disturbance’. I was swimming against the tide of my mind!
This is the human condition, the condition of you too. The illusion is real and in a world where we are taught to control more and more often, we rarely get chance to give up the resistance. On those occasions where we are calm, we believe it is because we have done something right; loved enough, been loved enough, worked hard enough for today, made enough money. But non of that is true.
Feeling calmer, more loving, more at peace is ALWAYS because we have allowed it to emerge. We have given up the fight in our mind and accepted this moment for what it is.
Miracles emerge from this place, from this space in our mind that is accepted and allowed. Fresh new thinking, a better feeling, can all be along at any moment when we let go of control. Even more wonderful, energy starts to resume, bodies and Minds can heal and restore and our whole world can change without hardly anything changing at all <3
I invite you to surrender, to let go and to accept that you aren’t in control. I know that you wouldn’t be self harming with your own thoughts if you fully knew that is what you were doing! Who would?! 7.6 billion humans wondering the earth trying to make themselves feel better so that they can live a fulfilled and happy life. THAT, is a whole lot of Overthinking.
Imagine the whole raft of possibility if we start to let go!
Imagine the leaders who would relax enough to love and lead a little more!
Imagine the relationships that would be deepened!
Imagine the amount of compassion that would arise for ourselves and others with the simple realisation that we are already enough in this moment!
Imagine the ideas that would be given space to be actioned!
Again, I invite you to surrender, to give up the internal battle, to put down your shitty spoon and discover what emerges for you <3