Why do I Procrastinate?

Why do I Procrastinate?

Why do I Procrastinate? I looked at my client and smiled and said ‘Because you’re pure wisdom and wisdom knows when you’re moving away from the truth of who you really are’ She looked at me and stayed quiet.  In the stillness, I could sense our connection to Universal Energy, to Source and I simply enjoyed the moment, whilst my client, sitting across from me, I could see was feeling it too, the presence.  I could also see that she was searching for something to say and so I gently reminded her to allow the feeling and to enjoy it.  Words can come later

My clients question about procrastination is a common one and the answer becomes ever more clear and simple to me.  When we forget who we really are, our true nature and that our peace of mind is innate, we make psychological attempts to prove ourselves.  We start trying to control how we feel, sometimes by taking an action or even by not taking an action.  Before we know it, we are out of sync with life and we can’t quite decide what we should be doing or where to start.  We might try even harder to gain control and make decisions that were previously already made. We catch hold of every thought that passes through our Mind and since the average human has around 60,000 a day, that’s a lot of thoughts to be noticing and meddling with and long term will lead to exhaustion and potentially more serious physically symptoms and chronic illnesses.

Symptoms of Procrastination

We don’t have to do anything about procrastination, other than recognise the symptoms. Rather, procrastination, like any feeling, is an indication of our state of Mind in that given moment.  Procrastination is a trip switch, a clever hack that nature has gifted us to warn us the we are going off track and we have simply forgotten that. The symptoms of procrastination are often confusion, impatience, forgetfulness,indecisiveness, boredom and a lack of concentration. The reason for these feelings is that Mind is gently trying to nudge you to let go of making the decision, doing the thing or thinking about it.  Mind is reminding us that we don’t have to ‘think’ because Mind does the ‘thinking’ for us.

How to stop Procrastinating?

How can you stop procrastinating? By recognising that you are and seeing that all humans do it naturally and all humans slip out of it naturally too.  We don’t have to stop procrastinating when we understand that procrastination is a signal that we are overthinking.  The only thing that makes sense in that case is to stop and I mean stop trying too! The human Mind is built to clear naturally if we surrender to that fact and let it pass.  In the meantime, maybe you might choose to find something else to do instead or even take a rest, go for a walk, spend time with people you love and allow yourself to slip gently back into presence. When our Mind clears, the sun is back out and peace is resumed, creativity takes hold and decisions come effortlessly, from that deep place of knowing

I saw my client two weeks after that session and she greeted me with news of just how effortless business had been lately.  She described how being in flow and making designs for her team, wasn’t something she had given any thought to whatsoever, rather, it had just seemed to happen. ‘Anyone would think we are governed by Universal Energy and that life is easy after all’ I said with a smile. She grinned back at me and winked ‘It is’ <3

Nicky x

 

Keep Life Simple

Keep Life Simple

Keep Life Simple has become a mantra of mine, not because life is complicated, but, because it can sometimes seem like it is.  Relationships, work, finances and having anything resembling a social life can seem like it entails lots of negotiating, planning for, working towards and thinking about.  It looked like that to me for most of my adult life, until I realised that I was simply over-complicating matters.

In fact, the fact that it seemed complicated to do, was one of the main things that prevented me from making moves to simplify my life.  Take for instance, my move to self employment and becoming a Coach.  Wow, now, that was one major complication and one that took me two years to see the simplicity that was always right there in front of me!  Here is how it went:

Im now a coach and everyone will want coaching when they see the benefits! So, how do I show them the benefits? Well, I speak to everyone I possibly can about coaching of course…….*watches as everyone disappears out of the room when they see me coming*.  Hmmmm, ok, so I’ll give marketing a go, I mean, marketers say it works so I’m pretty sure that I will be earning 6 figures in no time!!  I learn how to do Facebook ads, start a Facebook group, talk about coaching all over Social Media……..*watches as absolutely nothing happens other than a few likes on some posts*

You see, no one can really understand the benefits of coaching until they’ve experienced it because it has such a personal impact.  I really started to see this after 18 month of slogging away and making only £250.  Yes, you read that right, £250 in nearly 18 months.  It wasn’t a business at all, it wasn’t even a hobby, it was a bad habit, something that I just refused to fail at and kept going because I didn’t want people to think of me as a failure.  I had no concept then of how actually, what other people thought of me was simply their imagined version of me and could not possibly impact me.  It really looked like it could.  Not only that, it looked like my own failure was impacting me too.  I was stressed, not sleeping and contemplating suicide daily.  I mean, really contemplating suicide, until one day, I found myself in a hotel room in London, believing that I was making suicide my reality, I was actually going to do it and at last, I had found a way of doing it so that my family would suffer less. They wont even know it was suicide because it would look like a tragic accident.

Anyway, I will save that story for another time, because, here I am and what I found, starting that evening, was Service <3  Yes, it was a slow discovery and it was months later when I worked with a coach, to help me make sense of it.  I just had an inkling that actually, I hadn’t been helping people at all, I had been ‘selling’ to them.  A natural mistake to make I know, but, a mistake nevertheless.

Selling only crosses my mind now when Im feeling insecure! Instead, I am in service.  Not just in my business, but in life.  In my personal relationships with my partner, my friends, family, colleagues, clients, everyone and that includes myself! Selling my coaching is unnecessary when I am in service.  I help people uncover their own misunderstanding and shift their life and they want to pay me for that.

There is nothing for me to do other than those things that I want to do.  I have gradually dispensed of ‘should do’s’ and ‘need to do’s’ and in doing so, discovered that my life was full of those.  I discovered space and now I want to do the things that I do. I write, I see, I work out, I spend time with the people that I love, I help others, I travel, I spend more time in joy and less time in striving.   My mind isn’t full of ways to manage a to do list and so its cleared the way to live in service!

You see, I might have these odds slightly wrong, but, they aren’t far off; there is a 300 trillion to one chance of you being born as you!!! You could have been born as anyone, but no, you were born as you!! Odds like that don’t happen for nothing!  There is a reason you were born as you and that reason is, that is your purpose, to be you!  There isn’t any need for you to search for your purpose, you ARE it! Right now, you’re it! <3

Live each moment knowing that! Speak from that! Listen from that space. There isn’t much else to do, other than exactly what you want to do, that is service.  You see, to be in service to others, we have to first be in service to ourselves!  We have to see that we aren’t here to multi-task, strive harder and do more.  We are here to do, to create, with Grace and joy!

Allow other people that same Grace.  Slow down and rid your life of ‘should do’s’ and and lovingly and honestly let them know that they can too.  Hold their hand and show them, guide them, speak to them and listen to them and remember, in doing so, listen to you!

As I gradually realised the truth of this, my life shifted gear, along with my personal relationships and my business relationships.  This is where I work from, serve from, that place! There is no need to to worry about who I should be, could be, would rather be, because, I am me and showing up that way, I am able to help others see their truth too! Living from integrity takes the need to manage our lives off the table and allows us to somehow to slow down whilst doing more of what we love <3

Keep life simple and in service to yourself, reflect on your to do list and remove all of those ‘should’s and needs’.  The chances are, they can wait, or can be done by someone else, or even, not done at all.

 

Is Visibility Important?

Is Visibility Important?

You are a business leader and if you want to reach clients online, you may have been looking into various ways of marketing your business and so, one of the questions you may have is; Is Visibility Important?  The short answer is; it depends

If you are a Coach, Therapist, or some sort of Change Worker and your practice is fully booked, weeks or even months in advance, then no, not at this point.  You can relax and be reassured that you are already visible to those who will benefit from your services or products.  You have probably already gone through the process of finding out how to get clients and discovering that the best way, is through finding a potential client, offering them the very thing that you know they want and then providing outstanding service.  The results then speak for themselves.  You will be getting a constant stream of referrals and visibility has taken care of itself.  Until that is, you want to grow and scale, expand and recreate something even bigger and more impactful.  If that is you, you might wish to read on.

On the other hand, if you are a Coach, Therapists or some other Creative and you are struggling to get clients, then it makes sense that you start to understand that finding and building an audience is essential.  I am not talking numbers here, I am talking people, real live people who want to connect and build relationships and who join your audience, your tribe, your crowd, whatever it is you choose to call it.  It’s a group of people who love and care, support and each other and who are looking at you for ideas, solutions, and support for what they see as their problems right now.

I mean, you probably know you can offer a solution right? Thats why you have chosen to dedicate your life to helping people.  What I found though, is that many people in the change work profession, have a tendency to believe they can work with anyone and everyone…..the result is, they work with very few.  ok, maybe a few, but, those few don’t amount to a business that is profitable and sustainable.

Its then not long before the inevitable happens; funds run low, stress runs high and motivation to continue runs dry! If you recognise yourself in this, consider these options:

  • Drilling down, getting deep, uncovering your strengths, is exactly the thing you need to do right now.  You will then know the quickest and easiest way that you can help people…..You will find a niche!
  • Finding a niche is NOT restricting you!  Finding a niche will enable you to be seen and found more easily, in an already very busy marketplace! 
  • As you get clearer and clearer, you can help more and more people and also, more and more people will be referring you!
  • Recognise that you’re amazing at what you do.  You are an enabler, an encourager and yes, you show people how to step out of whichever pigeon hole they are currently in.  To do that though, you have go and venture into their pigeon hole!

You can have as many audiences/niches as you like, but, unless you are clear on what they are, you cannot speak to their pains and show them how they can be free of that pain.  7.6 billion people inhabit this amazing planet and so, to be heard, you have to find YOUR people! You have to become visible to them!

Mainly though, realise that you are ALREADY visible but to be visible and have impact, showing up as who you really are, without the filter, without being guided by insecurity, will allow you to connect and share more deeply.  Business, like life, is truly built on relationships and so your willingness to take a chance on you, to come for that deep place of knowing, will enable others to meet you there

Below you can see a comments about my Visibility Toolkit <3

“I thought I would write-up my experiences so far from the ‘Visibility Toolkit’.

I was stuck before I started this course. I felt uncomfortable about being visible and worried about taking action but hadn’t got going. Then you offered the toolkit and I knew I had to join it. It has given me practical tips and ‘how to’ do things and this was so useful. But it gave me so much more… I have never taken so much action and have enjoyed every step of the way.

I have:

Really embraced Instagram (not so much on the other social media platforms so far but I know they will come when I am ready) I have gone from 7 to over 2000 followers in 5 weeks! Not only am I getting followers but people are also commenting against my posts so I am engaging with them.

Previously, I was beginning to develop online courses but would not have had anyone to deliver them to. Now I am growing an audience (as well as my confidence)

I loved producing videos and they have helped me increase take-up on my Parent Workshop locally. Each time I have sent the videos out then sign-up has increased so I am almost full and there is still over 2 weeks still to go.

I am taking up offers to become more visible and also approaching others to collaborate on work that I would not have done before.

Also, I took part in another challenge and created 2 mini eBooks and have sold 7 so far online, some through the Instagram link as taught by you. Previously, I would have engaged in the challenge to find out ideas but not taken action and put it off for some later date until I felt ‘ready’ (i.e. probably never!).

I know that I have done the work on this but the Visibility Toolkit and working with you has certainly been the catalyst for me and for that I am extremely grateful.

I found the format was clear and the bonus section really helpful. I appreciated the weekly calls for input and value being able to jump on future calls as the programme rolls out again. I have found the whole experience highly impactful and love the care and consideration you give to those you work with. 

Love Karen

Is Visibility important? Absolutely!

Nicky x

 

 

Overwhelm is overwhelming

Overwhelm is overwhelming

Overwhelm is overwhelming isn’t it? I know, honestly i do.  It seems to creep up from nowhere; one moment we are flowing through life, the next, we are standing in a pool of quick sand, sinking up to our neck and reaching out for a branch to pull us safely to shore before we go under.  During some of those moments, the feeling of panic can border on unbearable, the branch looks like its in reach, yet, our fingertips are millimetres away and we cannot get a grip.

Maybe someone will come along any moment and throw us a rope, or, we might wake up and discover it’s all just a bad dream.  We might even get to the end of that to do list after all, if only we can stand on our tip toes and keep from being swallowed by the mud.  Oh my gosh, the mud! It’s going to consume me, I am going to die an uncomfortable death, swallow gob full’s of mud and choke, gasping for air, I can only hope that it’s over quickly.  Everyone will know that I died of my own failings and that I should have avoided the quick sand.  I should have had enough foresight to know, to see that it was there.  If only I had been a better hunter, a better warrior, I would have taken an easier route.  If I get out of this alive, I will employ a guide, or, I will never come this way again, or, I will find a way of working quicker and smarter, of leaping over the quicksand.

Familiar? I mean, to do lists, there’re pure evil sometimes aren’t they? Relationships, children, jobs, businesses, even navigating the shopping can be enough to tip us over the edge.  Countless times I have stood in some queue waiting to be served with a feeling of impatience, or, I have been in conversation with my partner, child, friend or colleague but, Ive not really heard what they’re saying because, I am already 3 or 4 items down my own mental checklist of things to do, urgent things, things that will pull me under if I don’t tick them off soon.

Lack of sleep, pushing back tears that I haven’t got time to cry, avoiding phone calls that I really should make but haven’t got time for, sending rushed emails, or else, not sending them at all and the exhaustion.  The total overwhelming feeling of needing rest, real, wholesome and nourishing rest that I know will sustain me, will support my plight, but which is representative of the just out of reach branch that I am fighting so hard to get hold of, but, which I know can only happen if I can hold my head up enough to even see it.

And then, there it is again, the vicious circle that is life, that is overwhelm, that I am trying to step outside of but, I can’t seem to find the exit point!

The good news is I found it! Would you like know what it is?

The feeling of overwhelm, however it plays out in your life, however powerful and unpleasant it feels; It’s a feeling!  It’s a state of mind and it’s VERY common.  It’s common because, as humans, we believe we should or need to be Superhuman! The truth is, we already are, when we remember that our feelings aren’t telling us whether we are doing a good job of life….our feelings don’t know anything about that.  In fact, our feelings don’t know anything outside of us at all, but, because they appear so tangible, we believe that our feelings do know exactly how we are doing, or what we should or need to be doing!

Our feelings only know ONE thing; what the nature of our thinking is in any given moment!

When we believe that our feelings are telling us about something other than the principle or nature of thought, we start to try to manage our feelings by managing the things that we believe our feelings are about; the to do list, the boss, the business, the finances, or in the case of overwhelm, absolutely everything!  Before we know it, our mind, which actually has the capacity to clear all on it’s own when left alone, has suddenly been given an impossible task, that of altering an outside state.  Our mind is an inside job and cannot possibly manage something which it doesn’t have responsibility for.  Our mind is reaching for that illusory lifeline.

Swap lifeline for shopping list, relationship, job, work, boss, colleagues, etc etc, but, you get the picture?  Of course, there are always things to do and I am not suggesting that you don’t need to do them, but, you are not able to control your feelings by doing them.  Feelings, they change shape naturally, all on their own, when we stop trying to change them, manage them, have more or less of them. Clarity is our natural state and it is innate!

When we see for ourselves that in any given moment, regardless of the feeling we are experiencing, we are still ok, it’s almost like we realise for ourselves that we can in fact straighten our legs and touch the bottom of what looked like a pool of quick sand and stand up straight.  We are in a better position to attend to the job at hand from there, to lean over a little and grab the branch.  Ok so, its a little messy, there were a few hairy moments, the wade into shore wasn’t totally pleasant, but, we are safe.  Maybe we could have swam gracefully, maybe someone else will compared to us, but, so what? Is graceful and safe and better than messy and safe? Of course not!

If you are experiencing overwhelm, understanding that the feeling of overwhelm is an indicator of how busy your mind is and not the importance or urgency of your to list, is going to do all of the heavy lifting and will push you to safety with a lot less effort.

Of course some things in life are urgent, but, you will be far better equipped to perform them with a clearer mind than with a muddy mind.  You are built to navigate life in any given moment, your mind will self correct along the way.  To find out more, email me on nicky@nickybartley.com

Have you woken up in a bad mood?

Have you woken up in a bad mood?

Today I woke up in a bad mood!  This happens sometimes right? We go to bed perfectly fine, but, we wake the next morning and life feels shiz!  Actually, that is NOT what happened, let’s rewind.

I woke up and my first thought was ‘Wow, I slept well, I bet today is going to be a good day‘.  20 minutes later, I was arguing with my partner about I don’t even know what and life felt rubbish!  A series of ‘mini thoughts’ began, all of which, went something like; ‘Ugh, if only I made more money, my life would be much more entertaining‘ and ‘Ugh, I forgot I had run out of milk, now, I am going to have to nip to the shop before getting on a call with my client.  I really should have done this last night.  I always do stuff like this, I am so useless.  If I could learn how to be more organised, my life would be better, easier somehow’

I didn’t actually have time to get to the shop as, by the time I had showered and got dressed, it was time for my call.  The call went great, as in fact it always does.  I love talking to Ross, really listening and connecting with him and finding out where he is at.  A couple of times, I noticed my thought wandering somewhere else, like, ‘I better make sure I get the milk afterwards‘ and ‘I wonder if Ross can tell that I am in a bad mood‘ and then, connection between us would drop.  I asked Ross to repeat what he had just that second said and explained that I had been distracted and I noticed Ross’ face relax.  i guessed that he had in fact noticed that I wasn’t quite present and it had probably confused him, I mean, I normally always listen.  A few minutes later, we were in deep connection, my mind had settled and the time we spent was beautiful, full of plans, ideas and space.

Our state of mind shifts constantly and it’s guided by a universal life flow, a life energy that is beyond our control.  It is the same universal energy that grows trees and keeps our heart beating, drives the ocean waves and moves the earth around the sun.  Try to control it and you’re going to lose!  Ohhh, ok, so, it might appear that you can control it on occasions, you know, mindfulness, meditation, a glass of wine, a blazing row!  All of these things are an attempt to change something that, in that very moment, we are forgetting that we don’t actually control or cause!

My initial assumption that my day was ruined because I had no milk, was me forgetting that not having milk has NO baring on my state of mind and, if it has no baring on it, it cannot change it!  When I forget that, I might (as I did) berate myself for not having milk, for not being organised or caring or bothered and ALL of that, looks and feels like it’s because of the feelings I have.

Then I remember the truth;  My feelings are only ever telling me one thing….that I am feeling thought in the moment!  I am feeling my thinking, not ‘what’ I am thinking about!  I had experienced a shift in mood, in mind, in feeling and I had attributed it to something outside of me, in this case, the lack of milk and the fact that I had been the one who forgot it.  I was lost in my bad mood, however, my call went beautifully, go figure?  I mean, why did the bad mood not affect the quality of the call?

Here’s why; Our state of mind is governed by universal energy and as such, it changes constantly.  Because it was never caused or even about the lack of milk, or in fact, anything else outside of me, it could never be impacted by anything outside of me.  What could have made that call less than it was, is if I had not understood this and had tried to change the mood.  Instead, I just explained my distraction and made an effort to say connected to Ross, to listen and to be in a space with him.  My mood is irrelevant and says nothing about my performance, or my clients or even my partner or the lack of milk.

Now, imagine an electricity current going from one end of the room, to the other.  You know that YOU are not the source of the current right? Of course you do, it’s electricity, its created and governed by exactly the same universal energy that you are governed by.  If you suddenly decided that the electricity was to blame for your mood, would you start to throw water over it? or, put your hand in it? I imagine that to be a resounding No! because, you understand, that’s just not how it works and that you’ll be not only wasting your time doing such a thing, but, it’s not going to be an effective means of getting rid of the current.  In fact, it’s like to make the whole situation worse.

Well, trying to change you thoughts and feelings works on that principle too!  You are putting your fingers in the machinery, when, you don’t actually have to do anything about something that you are not responsible for or the cause of.  That electricity current might look like something beautiful in 5 minutes time, as opposed to something dangerous as it does right now.  Still, it’s not your job to poke around with it.  It’s your job to see that if you leave it alone, you’re still fine anyway, still free to continue going about doing whatever it is you are doing and the results you get, are not dependant on mood, thought, or the electricity current 🙂

Imagine how much time and energy you will have when you see the truth of how life works, how thought and feeling really work and how, non of that can determine what happens today, or any other day! <3

How to be Happy

How to be Happy

How to be happy is a topic that I find crops up almost every day with not only my clients but with friends, family and colleagues.  Despite being a coach, it still never fails to surprise me when during conversation, it becomes obvious that others are purposefully avoiding happiness yet openly pursuing it.  Oh, the irony!  Indeed, I myself have lived this way for most of my life, not recognising that I had the capacity to always be healthy and well because healthy and well is my natural state.  Learning of the principles behind clarity and how thought affects our experience in any given moment was my catalyst to begin to access success.  Success in my relationships, business, health, infact, in all areas of my life.  As my grounding in the principles deepens, my experiences of and in life lift, become lighter and brighter, yours can too.

Speaking to a friend of mine recently whom I had not seen for around 10 years and she was telling me, quite intently, of her dreams, her future goals and her great aspirations.  Whilst she was using such phrases as “I cannot wait until…..” and “Everything will be great when….”.   I sat quietly and just listened to her future plans and how some day, when she had everything she wanted, life would be great.  “Of course” she explained, “after such a stressful and sad time following the divorce, I know I just need to get back on my feet and then I can follow my own dreams”. Whilst I wholeheartedly agree that space to greave is definitely a good place to start following any such traumatic life event, whether it be divorce or death, I quietly asked her why she believes that ‘being back on her feet’ is a future event?  She stopped right there and I sensed her understanding shift as her realisation of the fact that there was nothing preventing her from being happy now, impacted her.  My emotion mirrored hers as I felt her heart swell, I was right there with her, connected and feeling love.

Most of course, do move forward and go on to live happy healthy lives, but, there are some who, for one reason or another, do not.  It is so easy to get stuck in resentment and pain and embody that pain as their identity.  Before they know it, they are unknowingly playing out the role of being victims of their thinking, however, would you ever dare point this out?  I would advise caution and instead, simply point them gently to their inner connection, their innate wellbeing, with love and empathy.

You see, very few people really want or enjoy being a victim or even recognise that they are.  Often, when stuck in their grief and pain, it is due to fear, guilt and anxiety rather than need or desire and the fact that we are simply feeling our thinking from moment to moment.  That is both our human gift and our failing.  Our ability to think, conceptualise, form perceptions and weigh up possibilities does not always afford us the freedom we would assume that it does.  We all at some time, lose someone whether it be death or the end of a relationship and we experience a whole host of emotions and although this is perfectly natural and normal, to stay for longer than necessary in those emotions is not healthy.

My friend for instance, her divorce was finalised over 3 years ago and the relationship had broken down 18 months beforehand.  Although there are no set rules for how long the grieving process should or can take, over 4 and a half years later, one could be closer to becoming comfortable with the idea.  There could be an element of acceptance and a mellowing of the emotions rather than the raw pain experienced in those early days.  An inability to deal with or move through grief extends stress and anxiety and can mentally paralyse the person experiencing such emotions.

An understanding of Clarity and it’s principles can help to move someone through this process and towards a settled state.  Thought is always the culprit.  Once we understand how the mind operates and that emotion is borne of thought, it easier to gain an isight into how people get stuck in their own grief. Emotions are powerful and the effects are often physical, leaving one in pain.  This cycle can feel scary and almost always leads to further pain and further thoughts.  Our thought though, is neutral and says nothing about the actual experience, until we think it does.  Thought is a perception of actual reality and not a mirror of reality as we might assume.

Being able to take a break from thought is a huge help and most people do this naturally in a reasonable amount of time.  Even the briefest break from thought can be helpful and doesn’t always have to be noticed.  In fact, often, these small breaks occur naturally when distracted by conversation with others, social events, work and so on and gradually extend themselves for longer periods, giving the mind that much needed rest from the chatter and a natural recovery ensues.  Understanding that we are only ever living in the present moment, for that is the only moment we have, can help thought to begin to drop away and bring space for fresh thought.  Along with that come new opportunities, new thought, new perspectives on experiences in the moment and space to continue to connect with our own innate health and wellbeing.

If you recognise that someone you know is or may be suffering in this way, one of the kindest and most loving things you can do is to reach out and connect with them.  Listen to what they have to say without judgement and really hear their message and show that deep level of understanding that they so need.

We are human, thought created feeling is one the traits of humanity, but, it can also be drawback.  Once we get a deep understanding of how our mind works, we can change our inner peace.  We then know in our essence that losing someone does not signal the end of a connection with a loved one, for that will always remain.  We are after-all, each connected to each other and learning to appreciate that we live in the present moment, we can really begin to experience that connection.

The all illusive question, how to be happy following a difficult and upsetting experience does not lie in the future, the answers are always in the present.  One of the commonest thoughts to prevent happiness is blame.  Blaming a partner for ending a relationship or blaming oneself for not being able to save it, is not rare.  But if thoughts don’t move on to acceptance, at some point, the feelings created by remaining in that blame state are often anger or guilt and or any other number of insecure thoughts and feelings.

We are always acting in accordance to what our own perceptions of the world are and perceptions are illusions.  Someone else’s perceptions of the same situation may be totally different and so how do we resolve this?  Well certainly, we can argue it out and try to work out who is right and who is wrong, however, both or all parties are right as we can do no more than act in accordance to that which we perceive to be true or correct.  Knowing this, really gaining an insight into the principles brings clarity and makes it easier to see how these misunderstandings arise and can in turn alleviate guilt, anger and blame.  In fact, we are all subject to the same misunderstanding and so in this vein, we are innocent of blame.  What you experience, perceive, is true for you, therefore, that is the only truth available in that moment.  Another or a different truth is however, only a thought away and opens up the possiblity for a whole new and different experience.

If you are interested in finding out more about Clarity and the underpinning principles to help support yourself or someone you know through a difficult and traumatic time you can email me on nicky@nickybartley.com