Why do I Procrastinate? I looked at my client and smiled and said ‘Because you’re pure wisdom and wisdom knows when you’re moving away from the truth of who you really are’ She looked at me and stayed quiet. In the stillness, I could sense our connection to Universal Energy, to Source and I simply enjoyed the moment, whilst my client, sitting across from me, I could see was feeling it too, the presence. I could also see that she was searching for something to say and so I gently reminded her to allow the feeling and to enjoy it. Words can come later
My clients question about procrastination is a common one and the answer becomes ever more clear and simple to me. When we forget who we really are, our true nature and that our peace of mind is innate, we make psychological attempts to prove ourselves. We start trying to control how we feel, sometimes by taking an action or even by not taking an action. Before we know it, we are out of sync with life and we can’t quite decide what we should be doing or where to start. We might try even harder to gain control and make decisions that were previously already made. We catch hold of every thought that passes through our Mind and since the average human has around 60,000 a day, that’s a lot of thoughts to be noticing and meddling with and long term will lead to exhaustion and potentially more serious physically symptoms and chronic illnesses.
Symptoms of Procrastination
We don’t have to do anything about procrastination, other than recognise the symptoms. Rather, procrastination, like any feeling, is an indication of our state of Mind in that given moment. Procrastination is a trip switch, a clever hack that nature has gifted us to warn us the we are going off track and we have simply forgotten that. The symptoms of procrastination are often confusion, impatience, forgetfulness,indecisiveness, boredom and a lack of concentration. The reason for these feelings is that Mind is gently trying to nudge you to let go of making the decision, doing the thing or thinking about it. Mind is reminding us that we don’t have to ‘think’ because Mind does the ‘thinking’ for us.
How to stop Procrastinating?
How can you stop procrastinating? By recognising that you are and seeing that all humans do it naturally and all humans slip out of it naturally too. We don’t have to stop procrastinating when we understand that procrastination is a signal that we are overthinking. The only thing that makes sense in that case is to stop and I mean stop trying too! The human Mind is built to clear naturally if we surrender to that fact and let it pass. In the meantime, maybe you might choose to find something else to do instead or even take a rest, go for a walk, spend time with people you love and allow yourself to slip gently back into presence. When our Mind clears, the sun is back out and peace is resumed, creativity takes hold and decisions come effortlessly, from that deep place of knowing
I saw my client two weeks after that session and she greeted me with news of just how effortless business had been lately. She described how being in flow and making designs for her team, wasn’t something she had given any thought to whatsoever, rather, it had just seemed to happen. ‘Anyone would think we are governed by Universal Energy and that life is easy after all’ I said with a smile. She grinned back at me and winked ‘It is’ <3
Keep Life Simple has become a mantra of mine, not because life is complicated, but, because it can sometimes seem like it is. Relationships, work, finances and having anything resembling a social life can seem like it entails lots of negotiating, planning for, working towards and thinking about. It looked like that to me for most of my adult life, until I realised that I was simply over-complicating matters.
In fact, the fact that it seemed complicated to do, was one of the main things that prevented me from making moves to simplify my life. Take for instance, my move to self employment and becoming a Coach. Wow, now, that was one major complication and one that took me two years to see the simplicity that was always right there in front of me! Here is how it went:
Im now a coach and everyone will want coaching when they see the benefits! So, how do I show them the benefits? Well, I speak to everyone I possibly can about coaching of course…….*watches as everyone disappears out of the room when they see me coming*. Hmmmm, ok, so I’ll give marketing a go, I mean, marketers say it works so I’m pretty sure that I will be earning 6 figures in no time!! I learn how to do Facebook ads, start a Facebook group, talk about coaching all over Social Media……..*watches as absolutely nothing happens other than a few likes on some posts*
You see, no one can really understand the benefits of coaching until they’ve experienced it because it has such a personal impact. I really started to see this after 18 month of slogging away and making only £250. Yes, you read that right, £250 in nearly 18 months. It wasn’t a business at all, it wasn’t even a hobby, it was a bad habit, something that I just refused to fail at and kept going because I didn’t want people to think of me as a failure. I had no concept then of how actually, what other people thought of me was simply their imagined version of me and could not possibly impact me. It really looked like it could. Not only that, it looked like my own failure was impacting me too. I was stressed, not sleeping and contemplating suicide daily. I mean, really contemplating suicide, until one day, I found myself in a hotel room in London, believing that I was making suicide my reality, I was actually going to do it and at last, I had found a way of doing it so that my family would suffer less. They wont even know it was suicide because it would look like a tragic accident.
Anyway, I will save that story for another time, because, here I am and what I found, starting that evening, was Service <3 Yes, it was a slow discovery and it was months later when I worked with a coach, to help me make sense of it. I just had an inkling that actually, I hadn’t been helping people at all, I had been ‘selling’ to them. A natural mistake to make I know, but, a mistake nevertheless.
Selling only crosses my mind now when Im feeling insecure! Instead, I am in service. Not just in my business, but in life. In my personal relationships with my partner, my friends, family, colleagues, clients, everyone and that includes myself! Selling my coaching is unnecessary when I am in service. I help people uncover their own misunderstanding and shift their life and they want to pay me for that.
There is nothing for me to do other than those things that I want to do. I have gradually dispensed of ‘should do’s’ and ‘need to do’s’ and in doing so, discovered that my life was full of those. I discovered space and now I want to do the things that I do. I write, I see, I work out, I spend time with the people that I love, I help others, I travel, I spend more time in joy and less time in striving. My mind isn’t full of ways to manage a to do list and so its cleared the way to live in service!
You see, I might have these odds slightly wrong, but, they aren’t far off; there is a 300 trillion to one chance of you being born as you!!! You could have been born as anyone, but no, you were born as you!! Odds like that don’t happen for nothing! There is a reason you were born as you and that reason is, that is your purpose, to be you! There isn’t any need for you to search for your purpose, you ARE it! Right now, you’re it! <3
Live each moment knowing that! Speak from that! Listen from that space. There isn’t much else to do, other than exactly what you want to do, that is service. You see, to be in service to others, we have to first be in service to ourselves! We have to see that we aren’t here to multi-task, strive harder and do more. We are here to do, to create, with Grace and joy!
Allow other people that same Grace. Slow down and rid your life of ‘should do’s’ and and lovingly and honestly let them know that they can too. Hold their hand and show them, guide them, speak to them and listen to them and remember, in doing so, listen to you!
As I gradually realised the truth of this, my life shifted gear, along with my personal relationships and my business relationships. This is where I work from, serve from, that place! There is no need to to worry about who I should be, could be, would rather be, because, I am me and showing up that way, I am able to help others see their truth too! Living from integrity takes the need to manage our lives off the table and allows us to somehow to slow down whilst doing more of what we love <3
Keep life simple and in service to yourself, reflect on your to do list and remove all of those ‘should’s and needs’. The chances are, they can wait, or can be done by someone else, or even, not done at all.